A Contemplative Moment

Early this summer, our senior family members were invited to my brother and sister-in-law’s home to meet their first grandchild. She was born during the pandemic and few of us had the privilege of meeting her. On this special day, she was almost two years old and made her entrance in her mother’s arms following an afternoon nap.  She stayed close to her parents until she felt safe enough to wander around the large deck and meet the gang.

We enjoyed a wonderful July afternoon sipping cool drinks and catching up with family happenings. We watched with pride as the birthday girl opened her gifts: storybooks which she loves and a fluffy pale blue bunny that can no doubt be found in her crib these days.

Following a delicious summer supper, we continued to relax under the two large awnings.  Suddenly the sky became overcast, there was a thunderclap and rain began to sprinkle the deck.  Our little girl quietly stepped into the space between the awnings and opened her tiny hands to receive the falling drops.  All was silent as we watched the scene unfolding before us.  Obviously, this child in her pretty blue dress was experiencing a new and deep awareness of a special part of nature.  There she continued to stand, perfectly still, contemplating the raindrops meeting her being.

Image: Unsplash/Mike Kotsch

The rain fell slowly at first and then with increasing intensity until it suddenly poured.  She laughed and ran for shelter and her waiting grandpa. Suddenly, I realized that we had witnessed a profound contemplative moment, seen through the eyes of a child.

How much we take for granted in the everyday wonders of our world:  the beauty of summer, the change of seasons, the force of nature, a sudden cloudburst and the miracle of life and love portrayed in the blessing of our newest little family member.

-Sister Jean Moylan, csj

The Ties That Bind

Every year in early November we Moylan women arrive from various points in southwestern Ontario to cottage together, celebrate and keep our family connections close and loving.

The Moylan women are not a large group and the number who attend each year varies. Except for 2020 when COVID-19 cancelled our gathering, 2021 marked our 14th annual get-together. This year, seven of us weary Friday night travelers arrived with the usual anticipation of fun and strengthening the family ties. Following a tasty dinner and staking out our bedrooms, connections were renewed, and laughter shared until sleep and cozy beds beckoned.

How wonderful to wake up Saturday morning, knowing that the weekend was ours to linger over breakfast and catch up on family happenings until lunch miraculously appeared on the table. Meanwhile, after lunch we were fortunate to bask in autumn’s finest weather. Walks in the sunshine, contemplating sparkling Lake Huron, quiet reading by the fireplace and exploring every nook and cranny filled the afternoon. Niece Marianne spied a 1,000-piece jigsaw puzzle and her work began in earnest. It was a welcomed change from her usual busy RN days.

Following evening Mass in Bright’s Grove and a delicious candlelight dinner, we settled into an evening of relaxing activities. Emma 16, sat down to play cards with her three great-aunts. We oldsters enjoyed her youth and enthusiasm and her willingness to keep score.

All too soon, it was time to prepare for home. Marianne announced that she wouldn’t leave until the puzzle was completed so her cousin Janet stepped in to assist. We appreciated that throughout the weekend, there had been plenty of connecting with our nearest and dearest and embracing the ties that bind us together as family.

As we packed up our belongings, settled next year’s date and waved our good- byes, the beautiful Old Mill puzzle on the sturdy, hardwood table left a reminder of the blessing of family time awaiting the next group to arrive on the doorstep.

-Sister Jean Moylan, csj

A Father's Day Reflection

As the father of five and a grandfather of seven (almost eight!) I look forward to Father’s Day.  When I reflect on my role as a father, I think it can be summed up as nurturing the love which is at the heart of our family.

As a husband and father, I think first of all my wife, Clare, who is central to our family.  As a couple we have worked together to create a family which is pretty special – if I do say so myself! As parents, our love is the source of what energizes our family. 

Clare and I have had our share of joys – births (including twins in two generations!), family camping, graduations, weddings, new jobs, etc., etc.

We have also had our share of tribulations – miscarriage, mental illness, death of a newborn grandson, job losses, and especially the death of our Kevin, a victim of drug addiction. The strength that comes to me as a father has certainly helped bear these trials.

The high school I taught at in Peterborough (St. Peter’s) has as its motto “Through Trials to Triumph”, and I have always thought that this sums up our family life and my role as a father.  We have all suffered with and supported each other through various difficulties, and now as a family we enjoy a closeness which is special to us.

A very poignant confirmation of the success Clare’s and my life in creating family came as I followed Kevin’s coffin after his funeral.  As we walked to his grave I had a very strong feeling of joy come upon me and I thought “We’ve done something right!”  Despite the pain and sorrow of the moment, the outpouring of support from a huge variety of people – our friends (some of whom we hadn’t seen in ages) and many more friends of Kevin and of our other children made my spirit soar – "Yes, we've done something right – in the midst of this deep time   of grief for a son whom we supported the best way we knew how."

On this Father’s Day I am very thankful for Clare, for our children and their spouses, and, of course our grandchildren. 

I am blessed indeed!

Joe Keast, Archivist/Librarian for the Peterborough Sisters 

A Dad’s Day

Becoming a Dad changes you - completely.

It’s miraculous, really. 

The hardest part? Being there. And I don’t mean showing up, I mean being present. Fatherhood really hammers home the difference. It helps you realize how much you unknowingly phoned in important parts of your life — work, volunteerism and the friendships that matter. 

Being a good dad is hard. 

Everything gets hyper-focused. But focused doesn’t always mean easy. A selfish to selfless transition is a turbulent one. Even with a life partner that makes Wonder Woman look dazed and confused. (Thx love! xoxoxoxo)  

Over time you settle in. You wise up (sometimes). You start to calibrate your parental antenna to some universal truths about advice for your kids in this modern age.

Like:

• curiosity and creativity are more important than any string of characters at the end of an email signature;
• report cards influence life outcomes far less than we give them credit for;
•  the most valuable people in this world don’t do what they’re told, they tell the leaders what should be done;
• happiness has little if anything to do with material possession (especially in the long term);
• you never need as much stuff as you think you do;
• And perhaps most importantly, that you should never watch In the Night Garden, no matter how much your kids beg. ‘Cause some things, you just can’t un-see.

And on and on…

But the best thing about father’s day is being home with your kids, and loving them. 

Of all the things that make up the foundational pieces of our lives, family is by far the most important. 

You can tell a lot about a man by how he holds himself as a father. 

I didn’t get a chance to spend as much time with my Father as I would have liked. He worked morning, afternoon and night shifts, 10,000 feet underground, for 30 years, so I would never have to. 

The bottom line

I’ve got more from my kids, Molly (5), Cooper (8) than I can ever give back in a life time. 

I worry less these days about them not listening and realize I need to worry more that they’re always listening. And that parenting with purpose is something you practice, not something you perfect.

It’s about making a conscious effort to create a more profound relationship with the people that you love.

Everything else, I think, will fall into place. 

Guest Blogger Jeff Sage

Jeff Sage is a Senior Strategist and Co-Founder at sagecomm, a London-based strategic marketing firm specializing in brand, product and cause positioning for brands across North America.